Before the Storm

We had several tornado warnings this past Saturday, but right before the bad weather really hit us, this is what we saw in the sky. There are actually two rainbows. A fainter one is right above the vivid one. I always feel blessed every time I see one. I know it is a gift from God. The wind and rain hit us about an hour after that. It only lasted a few minutes. We were in Wal Mart when it hit, but by the time we left, it had already passed. The winds hit a few places in town including destroying the front of our older movie theater.

Tomorrow, I'll be 39 weeks. Going into labor is most of what I'm thinking about at this point. Every pain sends a thought of, "Was that a contraction?" My emotions are pretty much on a roller coaster ride. My hopes are up. My hopes are down. My hopes are up, and so on. Poor Scamp and Beef. I'm so irritable. I've felt a bit more encouraged today, but it is a trying time, a worrisome time. I want everything to be ok with the baby. I don't want to be induced, but at the same time, the waiting is really getting to me.

I'm also worried about the big change that is about to happen in our household. I have a hard time with change. Two children instead of one. How will we all survive?! I was freaked out, too, when I was pregnant with Scamp. I disliked people asking me if I was excited. Yes but more so freaked out about being a mother. I do have a little more confidence since this will be the second one.

This tends to happen to me: I freak out, lose faith, see that everything turns out just the way God intended, then I wonder why I ever doubted. I'm on my own journey through the wilderness. Gee, isn't it funny that that is exactly what we are studying in BSF? The books of Moses as he led the Israelites through the desert. And as if that big honking rainbow in the sky didn't speak clearly enough to me to have hope.

I really could use some prayers.:)

Scamp's Animal Parade

I had my 38-week doctor's appointment today and found out there has been no progress towards me going into labor. It is getting harder to wait. I took Scamp with me to the office. She is always so good while we're there and hides behind the little changing curtain and pretends it's her house.

After we left the building and got to the car, I cried. Scamp was really concerned and said, "Why you cryin', Mama?" I told her I was just ready to have the baby. She told me we were going to see baby sister soon and not to cry. She was so sweet.

We went to the outlet mall after that and got some specialty chocolates. I needed something to cheer me up. We went home, and I let her play for another hour before bed. I fixed her a snack and told her I was coming up to her room to put her to bed, and this is what I found: Scamp smirking from ear-to-ear and all (I mean all) her animals and babies lined up on the steps for an Animal Parade. This made my day. You've got to see the video below.

Birthday Pool Party

Sunday, we went to my nephew's (Bubby) 6th birthday party at the pool. I can't believe he is six already. He's had a big year with starting kindergarten. He had the stomach flu earlier but was able to still have fun at the party. He even had to be rescued by a lifeguard. He went into the 5 foot area without his life vest on. He was bobbing up and down, not panicking, so the lifeguard near him didn't think anything was wrong. But, another one a little further away saw him and tried to give him a life preserver, but when he didn't take it, she jumped in after him. We got a good scare, but Bubby wasn't even upset. When I was about his age, I went under and had to have my sister, Bubby's mom, pull me out. I cried and didn't want to get back into the pool for awhile.

Scamp had to wear her shades in the indoor pool. The party was in the evening, and the sun wasn't even shining through the windows. She's so adorable. She had the biggest time in the kiddie pool with her other cousins until she got mad at Bubby. She whopped him in the face with her bucket then cried when he yelled at her to stop. We didn't know what had happened until we saw the welt on Bubby's face!

Here's a good preggy shot of me. I'm 38 weeks today and still holding on. I'm ready to have this baby anytime you are, dear Lord!

Week 37

Can you believe I'm at week 37? Many of my friends say that the pregnancy has flown by, and I just laugh. It seems as though I've been pregnant for years! I'm already dilated to 2 1/2 cm and have been for almost 2 weeks. So, I really could go into labor anytime. I'm hoping for next week!

I've been so busy getting the house ready and going through Scamp's old baby clothes. That girl had a lot of teeny baby clothes. And now there all washed and sorted except for one load. Whew!

My 2 sisters-in-law and mother-in-law came over a couple of weeks ago and painted the new nursery for us. It's purple with a 2-foot pink horizontal stripe in the middle of the wall and a 3-inch green stripe on the top and bottom of the pink one. I have some pictures, but I always have trouble uploading them from my laptop.

I have a bag packed for me, Scamp, and new Baby Squirt, so we'll be ready to go when the moment arrives. I'm having the biggest trouble finding pajamas to wear at the hospital though. Hopefully, I'll find some this week.

The one-year anniversary of when we lost the last baby due to an ectopic pregnancy is Monday, March 23. So, Squirt could be born on that day. To see what God has done one year later is amazing, and I am so thankful for the new little life we are about to have.

I miss all my bloggy friends I haven't been able to check up with the last several weeks. I am thinking of all of you!

Silliness at the Doctor's Office

Today, I am 33 weeks and only have six more weeks left until my due date. Hooray! Last week's doctor's visit went well. The baby is growing. Usually, I take Scamp with me to my non-invasive visits (if you know what I mean) as I did this past week.

We are standing at the receptionist's desk in front of several other waiting patrons when Scamp asks, "Mama, do you have to pee in a cup today?"

I can see that the receptionist heard her when a huge grin appears on her face. I'm too embarrassed to turn and see who also has heard. I reply back, laughing, "Yes, baby, I do."

We are sent back to the restroom, and Scamp points to the cups and exclaims, "Get you cup, Mama." She can hardly contain her excitement. When it's her turn to use the potty, she lets me know matter-of-factly that she does not need a cup. "No, you don't, baby. No, you don't," I say trying not to laugh.

Oh, the laughs she gives me. I love my little Scamp.

Professional Belly Pics

The one below will be for the baby's room.

I was hoping to post more Scamp pics today but I can't get to them. Ugh! Anyway, here are a couple of pics my SIL took for me (for those of you who haven't seen them on FB). She's so great to do this, and she got even more great shots I haven't gotten back yet. The weather has been so chaotic lately. These were taken a couple of Sundays ago when it was in the 60s here.

I am 32 weeks and counting. I am beginning to get anxious about having the baby, wanting it to be over and a little nervous about going into labor. My back is giving me some big issues, and I was seeing the chiropractor. I stopped since the pain relief was not substantial, and insurance doesn't cover very much of the cost. I may go back my last few weeks of pregnancy though.

I am thankful to not have any serious medical issues, no high blood pressure or high blood sugar. The baby is growing well, and I am getting to the "uncomfortable" stage. I've been waddling for awhile now! We've got a name picked out but won't be sharing it on the blog. I hope to email all of you with birth announcements though.

More Belly Pics

Here are some more photos of my growing belly. A few people have noticed I'm pregnant now. I was pregnant with Scamp in the summer, and all kinds of people would approach me about my pregnant belly. Now, when I go places I'm all bundled up with my thick coat on, and people don't notice as much.

Scamp is always poking at my belly saying, "Hi, baby." When she sees other tiny babies she says, "I'm gonna have one of those." She asked me today if we we're going to have two babies. I told her no, just one. She seems to be fine with that.

I am 28 weeks today. We're getting very close to delivery. Last week, I had some excessive sharp pains in my lower left side. I have had them since the start of my pregnancy and was told it was a cyst (good thing) that developed on my ovary because of the pregnancy. The pain typically lasts 5-10 minutes and subsides, but I had been in pain for over two hours when I called my doctor. They told me to go to the ER, where they admitted me into Labor and Delivery.

The doctor who performed my surgery for the ectopic pregnancy I had back in March saw me. He did an ultrasound and found out everything was fine. I have a strained ligament, which is pretty common in pregnancy. I haven't had much pain since then. I also found out I'm anemic. It's funny how your pregnancy symptoms are the same as iron deficiency symptoms -- fatigue, irritability, inability to concentrate. I'm taking an iron supplement and am eating an iron-rich diet. Overall, I'm feeling pregnant, but it hasn't been too bad. We are feeling very excited and blessed. Beef has even cleaned out his office for the nursery. We hope to paint soon.

Fun and Embarrassing Facts About Being Pregnant

Experts say your body does many marvelous things during pregnancy, and here are a few of my most frightful (oops, favorite) changes (besides being used by God to create another complete human being):

• Forgetfulness. "Could you repeat what you just said? I forgot." is the phrase that often follows my conversations with others. My best forgetful moment was when I was pregnant with Scamp and needed to do some shopping at Wal Mart. I got halfway there and forgot how to get the rest of the way. After taking several wrong turns I eventually made it.
• Dry Heaving Mornings plus the added feature of peeing on yourself during the process. Why am I sharing this on my blog? I thought you all might want to know! LOL! At least I'm at the stage where it's not happening everyday.
• Having to Quickly Leave the Room after a Hilarious Moment. People, please don't make my laugh so hard because I'm probably going to wet my pants. It's not funny. Stop laughing!!
• Weird Skin Formations. Ok, so this hasn't happened yet this pregnancy, but with Scamp these strange little bumps developed at various stages on my face and neck. I eventually was able to pull them off except for the one on my eye, which is still present.
• Changes in Vision. Besides not being able to see quite as well I've had a couple of episodes where I had spotty vision. Literally, I saw dark spots where peoples faces were supposed to be. It was really scary the first time it happened, but it goes away after about 15 minutes.
• Claustrophobia Magnified. This has been way worse this pregnancy. I've had to leave the church service to sit outside on more than one occasion because people were sitting too close to me. I felt like I couldn't breath and didn't want to pass out, so I had to excuse myself.
• Shortness of Breath especially in the morning. I don't sing out loud in church anymore because I become so winded I feel lightheaded. It's a very similar feeling to the previous episodes.
• Being Hungry and Full at the Same Time. It's strange to feel so hungry, but you just don't think you can fit another ounce inside your stomach. There's no more room.

So, many strange things happen during pregnancy and probably multiple others that I haven't experienced. It's still worth every weird occurrence and embarrassing moment to hold the little life God formed inside your womb. What beyond-belief things have happened to you?

Think Pink

Today was the big ultrasound day. Everything seems to be happening much quicker this pregnancy. After several measurements and many minutes of chasing the little squirt around with the ultrasound (the babies' a fast little thing), the ultrasound tech told us some surprising news: we're having another girl! I was sure she was going to be a boy because I really thought Scamp was a girl, and I was right. Not that I wanted a boy over a girl.

One good thing is we won't need a lot of new clothes, crib bedding or blankets. Everything's already pink (or purple). I have at least 5 large storage boxes overflowing with Scamp's outgrown clothes. She's only in a 3T now. Plus, all her toys are pretty princesses and frilly dollies. Another plus is we are going to way outnumber Beef. He loves it! (Scamp usually takes his side though.)

Scamp is overjoyed to be a big sister, and she's getting exactly what she wanted, a baby sister. We are thrilled to have another girl. I wander what her nickname will be on Scamp's Place. I think I'll call her Squirt for now. I might even do a new blog title.

Belly Bump

As promised, here are the pictures of the "bump" at 18 weeks. No one has stopped me yet to ask if I'm pregnant.

My belly button started poking out a long time ago. I told Scamp the baby inside was growing and pushed my belly button out. She talks about this often. I wander how she really comprehends this.
The belly looks much more pronounced from the front. I definitely look pregnant from this angle.

13 Weeks and Counting

You all are probably wondering where I've been. I've had to take a big break from the computer and reading due to nausea. Actually, my morning sickness hasn't been as bad as it was with Scamp, but blogging and checking email cause me to feel sick. I've been trying to catch back up, so if you've emailed me and I haven't responded this is why. I still have over 200 messages to check in my yahoo account. Thank goodness a lot of them are junk mail.

It's only one more week until I'm out of the first trimester, and I'm hoping the nausea will subside. I did have an ultrasound a couple of weeks ago to make sure the baby was planted in my uterus and not my fallopian tube again. Great news! He/she is right where they're supposed to be. Scamp was so excited to see the tiny baby on TV. She claimed the ultrasound photo as her own. We still won't know the sex of the baby until another 5 weeks or so.

This pregnancy has been somewhat easier due to less nausea although I am uncomfortable a good portion of the time. I'm ravenously hungry all the time, and it's been hard to try to limit sweets and other highly fattening things that taste so good during pregnancy but may cause excess weight gain. Ok, the dietitian is coming out in me.

I do have to monitor my weight a bit more because of the back problems pregnancy causes for me. I have a mild form of spina bifida (spina bifida occulta), a birth defect in which the spinal cord may be protruding through an opening at the end of the spine. In my case (and my mother's since mine is genetic), the spine was not protruding out at birth, but the lower vertebrae are fused together. This has not had much affect on me besides the fact I will never be able to touch my toes, and I have to use extra caution with certain exercises. But, due to the weight gain with pregnancy, I will continue to have increased back pain with all activities. I had to wear a belly belt with Scamp and go to physical therapy because even walking caused severe pain.

Anyway, back to the positive side. I am so thankful that everything is ok thus far with the baby. God has blessed us, and we are trusting that He will continue to carry us through the pregnancy. I miss you all and hope to resume normal blogging very soon.

The Saga Continues

I got back from the doctor's office today. My hormone levels are slowly going down, but they told me last week I will have to have blood work every week until my pregnancy levels are at zero. Thank goodness the needle stick isn't as bad as it was at the hospital.

But, on to brighter news. Scamp went with me today. It's a 40 minute drive to my doctor, but we pass a great park on the way. I packed us a lunch, and we spent an hour and a half playing. The weather was (and still is) wonderful. It's sunny with a slight breeze. It's spring again. At least for this week. How's the weather on your end?

I won't be able to post any pictures today. I got some really cute ones yesterday with Scamp lounging outside in her sunglasses. Oh, she's getting so big. For some reason, our computer is running some sort of Windows updates, and it's taking hours and hours. So, hubby switched me over to a Mac (just until the updates are finished). I have to admit there are some neat qualities, but there's a few things that are just backwards and therefore frustrating to me with this computer. It looks nice though.

Isn't God Amazing?

Yet again another follow-up post. For the whole story read parts 1 and 2.

So, many of you may be wondering how I am doing emotionally. Well...I've pretty much been at peace since the beginning, minus the whole scared for my own life thing. Don't take it the wrong way that I didn't have concern and longing for the baby. God eased my concerns. It's quite an amazing thing. I thought I would feel guilt and tend to on a lot more menial things, but I felt like I handed my baby into the arms of Jesus. Of course, it helped that we only knew I was pregnant for less than 24 hours. Everything was in God's control.

I haven't really been through what I would consider a typical mourning process. I have not broken down. I may yet. But, I do believe that God used His word to prepare me for what Matt and I were about to go through. I do have some sadness over what could have been, but God has given me a quaint joy knowing that when I do reach heaven, I will see the child He had intended to live with Him in heaven. I know God also used those who interceded through prayer for Matt and I during this time.

I am full of awe for God for His mercy and power, and I am able to walk away from this knowing two things:

Prayer changes things.

And God's peace surpasses everything.

ER Scare: Part 2

If you haven't read part 1, click here.

The nurse finally got me set up with an IV and some pain medication. We were still waiting on the surgeon, so my parents decided to go ahead and take Scamp home with them. In the meantime, Beef's mom arrived, and he went home to pack a few things. Being standard procedure, the doctor requested a urine sample, so my MIL (Suzanne) helped me to the restroom and waited outside. I finished up and started feeling lightheaded, so she came in while I positioned myself on the bathroom floor. I knew I was about to blackout, otherwise I would not have laid myself down on the germ-infested floor in only a remnant of a gown. The nurse came in and tried to help me up. I informed her I was going to pass out, and even before she had me in the wheelchair I was out. I dreamed the ten or so paces back to my room and awoke to three nurses lifting me back onto my bed. My first thought was I wish I could go back to dreaming. I was so proud of my MIL though. She didn't freak out at all.

Beef came back, stunned to hear I had passed out. About that time, the surgeon came in and said he felt fairly confident that I did have an ectopic pregnancy. The only choice we had was surgery. The doctor informed us that you cannot replant the fertilized egg elsewhere, and it could be fatal if the tube ruptured. He was going to perform a laproscopic procedure. Basically this means I would only have three tiny incisions, one in my belly button and two a bit lower on either side.

I was in surgery within the next hour or so. I felt fairly peaceful until the actual time came of being wheeled into the operating room. But, the anesthesia took over quickly. The procedure lasted about an hour and a half. The doctor checked both tubes and found the pregnancy was on my right side. The intense pain I had was from blood seeping out the end of my tube with each heartbeat. Luckily, I didn't have very much blood in my abdomen.

I was released from the hospital later on that evening. Healing was fairly quick, about a week and a half. I followed up with my doctor the following week. Two days later, they called saying my pregnancy hormones were a little high, and I needed to head to the doctor's office immediately for another ultrasound. Again, I was terrified. But, when we arrived there, we had to wait over an hour. They didn't seem to be as panicked as the nurse had been on the phone with me. Again, the ultrasound revealed nothing, and I was sent over to the hospital for a couple of shots. These were supposed to break up any residual pregnancy tissue, plus cause some more pain. Other than a little nausea, the pain from the shots was minor though. I go back to my doctor tomorrow for follow-up bloodwork.

I am almost 100% back to normal and am able to lift Scamp as much as I'd like. The incisions have almost healed, and hopefully all will be well at the doctor's office tomorrow.

ER Scare: Part 1

Many of you already know about my recent scare over Easter weekend, but I wanted to go ahead and write out the details as a way of remembering.

I started having some anxiety attacks with the severest one on Thursday, March 20, the day before Good Friday. I'm used to having bouts of anxiety and thought the attacks would pass soon. By Friday, I was having more anxiety accompanied by abdominal pain that increased to cramping by that night. It was strange because it wasn't my normal "time" and the pain did not decrease with medication. I went to sleep and woke up in the middle of the night with intense back pain but was able to fall back asleep. I decided on Saturday morning to have Beef take me to the emergency room.

The doctor was concerned that I either had an ectopic pregnancy (pregnancy in a fallopian tube) or my appendix had ruptured, but the pain was too low to be my appendix. She ran tests and determined I was pregnant. It was a shock to us because I was still on schedule with my time of the month although the last one was abnormally long. We thought I must have been about 4 weeks pregnant. The doctor ordered an ultrasound that revealed nothing. It was just too early to tell. I was sent home with instructions to follow up with my doctor in a few days to see if I was still pregnant. The doctor was concerned that I may have already miscarried with my last menses. The nurse also informed me on what to expect if I was to miscarry. Beef and I were a little too apprehensive to be excited about the pregnancy due to all the pain I was having, but of course we wanted to have the baby.

I awoke on Easter Sunday at 5 am to intense cramping on my right side. I thought I was about to have a miscarriage but there was no bleeding. The pain was so severe I was scared for my own life. The doctor had told us that if an ectopic pregnancy ruptured, I could die. Beef got on the phone to my mother, who is a nurse. She and my dad would come up to get Scamp, but I told Beef just to go ahead and call an ambulance. Within 5 minutes two fireman were at our door followed shortly by two paramedics. One of the paramedics was our friend Chris who comes to our Thursday night get-togethers. He rode in the back of the ambulance with me while Beef stayed behind to get Scamp ready. It was nice to have a friend beside me.

I arrived at the hospital and was shortly met by my parents followed by Beef and Scamp. Beef said he had to lure Scamp out of bed with the promise of Easter candy. She came in with her Halloween bucket stuffed with Easter candy. They got me stabilized with pain medication, then we waited for the surgeon to arrive...

I will finish up the rest of the story tomorrow.

A Bit Better Everyday

Today has been a better day. My pain from the surgery has lessened drastically. It still hurts to sit up completely straight, but I am able to bend over and squat with a lot less discomfort. Our biggest concern right now is that we are all sick. Yes, Beef, Scamp, and I plus my extended family!!

Sore throats, hacking coughs, and sweaty fevers have prevailed this week. Sometimes my ribs are more sore than my stitches from coughing. Scamp had a fever all yesterday and it has come down somewhat today. My mom has been diagnosed with every kind of 'itis you can think of -- laryngitis, bronchitis, etc. You name it! She's at work right now instead of resting, so please pray she gets better soon as well. Sickness hasn't hit Beef hard...yet. He's had a bit of a sore throat, too. Hopefully, it won't get any worse for him.

I can't wait until things get back to normal. Big changes seem to affect me emotionally, and I'm needing some normalcy. Scamp and I usually get out of the house a few times a week, but I haven't driven by myself yet. And I'm not sure I can pick her up yet. The doctor should let me know tomorrow. The appointment will be my first driving excursion since the surgery. Thank goodness my friend Judith is going with me.

I Am Very Gracious

Hello Friends!!

It's pretty much been a pajama week for both Scamp and myself. I'm feeling better everyday. I'm in a lot less pain but am still pretty tired. I even hope to leave the house tonight -- my first trip in public besides the car ride Beef and I took earlier this week. BTW, he has been an exceptional husband and care-giver this week. He's not only had to work from home but has also had to take care of Scamp and I. I love you, Baby.

I mostly wanted to say thank you all for your encouraging comments and prayers. The amount of love I've felt over this whole ordeal has been phenomenal. God has really blessed us with such generous and caring friends and family members. And wow! I am thoroughly impressed with those of you whom I've never met face-to-face. You all mean so much to me.

God is really working and I am thankful for His care and provision most of all. I have prayed that God bless each one of you for your generous hearts. I still have a bit more recovering to do but hope to return to a more normal schedule this next week. I will be returning to my doctor this next Tuesday as well, so I hope all goes well then.

Thank you again!! I am very touched.